Oliver Goldsmith

Some faults are so closely allied to qualities that it is difficult to weed out the vice without eradicating the virtue.

Crime generally punishes itself.

Tenderness is a virtue.

Thou source of all my bliss and all my woe, that found me poor at first, and keep me so.

Take a dollar from a thousand and it will be a thousand no more.

You, that are going to be married, think things can never be done too fast: but we that are old, and know what we are about, must elope methodically, madam.

I... chose my wife as she did her wedding-gown, not for a fine glossy surface, but such qualities as would wear well.

There are some faults so nearly allied to excellence that we can scarce weed out the vice without eradicating the virtue.

The best way to make your audience laugh is to start laughing yourself.

Life at the greatest and best is but a froward child, that must be humored and coaxed a little till it falls asleep, and then all the care is over.